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生き延びて8年
あの秋も暑かった。
残暑が厳しくて9月に入っても真夏日が続いていた。
ポチもいたし、病院も普通にやっていたから土曜日だったのかな。

新米パパママには厳しい1日で、わけがわからなくて、
ただちゃっこいまだほんの数キロしかない王子だったけど、
彼が腕の中に居ないことが苦しかった。
切なさをあらわすようにお乳ではったおっぱいはパンパンにはれがっていて、
搾乳しないといけないのに動けなかった。
荷物を取りに帰った自宅でお乳を搾って捨てながら、ぼーっとしてた気がする。

長くて暑くて、
待合室で、ぼーっと放心しながら、タッチの中のワンシーンを思い出したりしてた。
かっちゃんが亡くなった時のお父さんとお母さんのぼーっとしたシーン。
うちらもあんな感じなのかなって思って、その後すぐに縁起でもないなと思い返した。


今日も暑くなって、生き延びた子は元気に学校で運動会の練習をしてきた。
疲れた顔して帰宅して、さっさと宿題を済ますと、
ゲームで遊びキックボードに乗って塾に行ったよ。
8年前
よくて植物状態って状況だった子が元気に走ってる。
あのときのわたしたちに教えてあげたいな。
大丈夫だよって、
たくさんいろいろあるけど大丈夫だよって

王子の二度目の誕生日がありふれた日常の中で普通に過ぎてゆくことに感謝。
生きているだけでいいからと切望した日々をしっかり思い返し、
それでも生きてくための知恵を教えておかないとなと気も引き締めて、
ただ、ありがとうと感謝します。

ふふふ。
王子がいてくれて嬉しいよ



■スポンサードリンク■
| yoyopin | 16:13 | comments (2) | trackback (135) | ゆけゆけ王子様::バカ親編 |
コメント
ありがとね


わたしからしたらのびちゃんのがすごいよ。
見習えないくらいにタカミにいるから

いつも見上げてる。
| よよ | EMAIL | URL | 07/09/26 19:49 | KPSI2jJU |

うんうん

よよちゃんは、素敵なママンだよ

私のお手本だよ(///)


(*^^)/。 ・:*:・゜ ★,。 ・:*:・゜☆


子供っていいねー

さっきお月様見てお兄ちゃんとベランダで梨食べながら語らったよ

皆が幸せになるようにふたりでお月さんに祈ったよ


こどもって可能性の塊りだよね


キラキラしててまぶしいよねー



| nobi | EMAIL | URL | 07/09/25 23:12 | lGfoAgfo |


コメントする








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おばあちゃまに買ってもらいました
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バンダイ
リトルパパに買ってもらいました
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イベント
悩み中
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特撮(映像) 佐藤健 白鳥百合子 秋山莉奈 松本若菜
予約完了
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福井 晴敏
これガンダムファーストの続きでつ
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萩原 光
ぴっかりさんの本はまずはこれから
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清水 弘之
清水先生の本ではこれが一番わかりやすいです。一押し!!
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